its sort of like we’re homeless saints

Well, Ugly and I are sipping elderflower wine in Prague. And its about time. As some of you are aware, the little monster and I are impromptu urban backpackers. We pick a city and go, ‘no reservations’ style. Traveling that way allows us the freedom to change our minds a dozen times without ever having to cancel. Which is why our trip to Istanbul (which was Constantinople, now its Istanbul not Constantinople…and more of the same) was relatively hassle free to cancel when the Middle East went on the fritz again recently and spilled over into the floodlands of Syria. Not to mention the rioting in Turkey. The whole area had slowly accumulated an air of “Huh, better not.”

So Ugly and I wound up headed for the Czech Republic instead. There is, of course, a rather difficult downside to our method of globetrotting: Cologne, Germany at midnight for example. That’s where we discovered the train we needed was booked solid, and the only one leaving that night.

Clutching a small loaf of bread, we gathered where the other addressless members of the night do: on the steps of the hulking Cologne Cathedral. Take two steps out of the Koln station doors and if you miss the socking great building then you must be blind.

A monument to gritty resolution and fallen angels, the house of God has the appeal of a scarred veteran. Its not attractive because of what it lost, but because of what it inherently gained through standing undaunted. There is a careful beauty in the smoke stained walls that is missing the other models littering Europe. The details carved when it stood white and gleaming under the sun have become part of a mosaic playing out in blacks and whites. The building went from being decorated in art centuries ago to being art in and of itself. Grungy, contrasting, the imposing Cathedral looms over the lost and exhausted on its terraced front steps.
My sunrise-chaser train wasn’t until 4:30am, so the temptation to curl up under the unforgiving stare of a long-dead saint and sleep was overwhelming.

But it had been over 24 hours since I last lay down, I decided to cut my losses and start searching for somewhere to rent a bed. Ugly and I found Hostel Hotel AO on our third attempt at widening circles around the Cathedral. It was cheap and clean, but along a party street. Every half hour a car horn when off or musical drinkers when by the street level windows. It was nice to be vertical for three hours, but sleep had not been a present friend. If I could have a superpower, it would be to have the best night’s sleep when I was sitting up. Like, on a plane or a train or a bus. But it was not to be.

The train from Koln to Nuremburg ran parallel to one of the prettiest sunrises I’ve ever seen. The ball of pure orange fire rising over the vibrant green of Germany’s forests almost made the whole night worth it. Even the bus ride wasn’t that bad once the World Cup fans stopped shouting drunkenly about the upcoming games. Ugly and I achieved the beautiful city of Prague at around 1:00, where I picked a random group of backpackers and followed them through the underground before surfacing in the older quarter of town. Then I surveyed my options and picked two French girls who I totally stalked through the streets of Prague to their Hostel, where I claimed a bed before wandering around the city.

Ugly and I stumbled upon the Museum of the KGB (shameless propaganda), the Old Alchemy Museum (shameless lies and falsehoods), and the manicured gardens of the palace (most intelligent thing I saw all day). Food here is magical. And not only is absinthe legal, but so is marijuana. So if I suddenly decide to destroy myself there’s Cannabis Absinthe at the corner store. In the meantime, exhausted and satisfied, Ugly and I are heading for a pub to watch the world cup game end…because that’s sure to be relaxing.